The purpose of this blog is for everyone to express their feelings about despair and what makes them have no hope wheather in their private life, but especially in their professional life. Also, sometime you just want to tell someone (e.g. your boss)something but cant say it to his face, so you get to say it here. You can also just tell a story that happened to you that made you feel desperate, or you could write something funny or sad about loosing hope.
Sunday, May 13, 2007
Quitters never win, Winners never quit, but those who never win and never quit trying are idiots
There are people who always keep doing this to you . . . give up, no use being a damn fool
1 comment:
Anonymous
said...
A picture is worth a thousand words. The man walking along the side of the road, going forward; the hand reaches down and thumb and finger moves the forward walking man back about a dozen steps, everytime the walker makes a little progress here come that thumb and finger to pick up the walker and place him back a dozen steps are so, making it impossible for the walker to make progress.
For forty years now I have been wondering why I continue to walk the same stretch of road over and over. I am aware of every event during those years, every situation that has fallen into ruin. I just never quit trying. I needed to get off that road. I did not see that the problem was, my blindness to the actions beyond my conscious awareness.
The worst part of this blindness is that it brings a sense of self failure, self recrimination, self doubt. It's no wonder, an intelligent person who continues to act like an idiot is bound to feel stupid, confused, and a bit crazy. I have to thank whoever posted this blog, it has changed my life, what's left of it anyway. I hate to admit this but I am seventy years old. My mother has controlled my failures and to everyone else who knows me, she has shown me to be someone who is a stranger to me. I have lost friends, opportunities, hopes, and finally the respect of three of my grown sons.
I wonder if anyone else out there has a parent or friend/enemy or family member who is the author, star performer, director, and producer of everyone else's opinions, beliefs, judgements in their world. I 'hope' that you also open your eyes and SEE what is happening before you also lose what is most precious to you.
You can not win against a person who, gives you a gift and then tells others that you threatened them to abandon them, if they did not give it to you.
You can not win against a person who pretends to everyone else that all they want is your love and that if they don't shower you with gifts and do exactly what you say, you won't speak to them.
If they tell others that everytime they see you, you want something and that they don't know what to do because they just can't afford to give you any more, that there are things they would like to have and places they would love to go, but they can't because they have to do so much for you.
It is to late to deny that you never told that person that if they didn't give you their car, that you would never see them again. After they have signed the car over to you as a gift and you are absolutely shocked and surprised, not having any idea that they would do just a thing.
If a parent tells you they want to help you finish graduate school and you apply and are accepted, start your classes, get involved in a practicum and then out of the blue they jerk the finances back and you have to drop out. Then they tell everyone that they wanted to help you and you just quit. And to make it worse, you believe them a second time start grad school again, and they do the same thing. IDIOT, IDIOT, IDIOT.
This goes on and on. Finally, the family and mutual friends are looking at you as though you are a useless, selfish piece of trash and you have no idea why? Then to top it off and finish you off, this "LOVING VICTIM" OF YOURS, INDUCES you to move back into her influence from a home you love and a life you have finally found; only to strike the final blow and turn your own children against you. I am the BIGGEST OF ALL IDIOTS, I refused to give up on winning and believing in my mothers love.
She convinced me that she wanted to borrow money from the bank, sell her home, and give me the money to build a house and home on property I owned, so that my dream of being near and involved with my precious sons and grandchildren could be a reality. She borrowed the money, she put her house on the real estate market, she gave me the money she borrowed and I began the plans, architect, site, well, permits, and we were ready to build. The house I had lived in before I moved back to her, belonged to one of my sons so he sold it, since I was moving to a home with my mother. All the plans were under way, I was in seventh heaven, then GRUESS WHAT? Yes, wonder of wonders she decided that was not what she wanted. But worse yet, she told my sons that I was forcing her to sell her house and build a house for me. They don't speak to me anymore, or answer my calls, I have lost them. The kicker was that I was on disability and when she changed her mind I had already moved all of my belongings into a house I couldn't afford, she wanted an interim house while the new house was being built, when her house sold she didn't not want to live in an apartment, in the meantime. I lived on $700. a month at that time and I had no other money. I couldn't stay in the rented house and I could not afford to move. My OVERLY GENEROUS MOTHER, gave me the remainder of the loan money and told me to take it and go wherever I wanted to go. In the past two years she has called me numerous times and begged me to come and get her, saying she wanted to be with me and she missed me. When I would finally give in and say I am on my way, she would tell my sons that I was going to come and get her and take her away, she didn't want to go. The last time was two days ago, I was ready to drive from Maine to California to get her, I looked at my finances and realized it would take every penny I have. I could ask what is wrong with me, but your blog shouted it out to me this morning. I AM AN ABSOLUTE, PERFECT IDIOT...and I can't win, I QUIT!!!!!!
1 comment:
A picture is worth a thousand words. The man walking along the side of the road, going forward; the hand reaches down and thumb and finger moves the forward walking man back about a dozen steps, everytime the walker makes a little progress here come that thumb and finger to pick up the walker and place him back a dozen steps are so, making it impossible for the walker to make progress.
For forty years now I have been wondering why I continue to walk the same stretch of road over and over. I am aware of every event during those years, every situation that has fallen into ruin. I just never quit trying. I needed to get off that road. I did not see that the problem was, my blindness to the actions beyond my conscious awareness.
The worst part of this blindness is that it brings a sense of self failure, self recrimination, self doubt. It's no wonder, an intelligent person who continues to act like an idiot is bound to feel stupid, confused, and a bit crazy. I have to thank whoever posted this blog, it has changed my life, what's left of it anyway. I hate to admit this but I am seventy years old. My mother has controlled my failures and to everyone else who knows me, she has shown me to be someone who is a stranger to me. I have lost friends, opportunities, hopes, and finally the respect of three of my grown sons.
I wonder if anyone else out there has a parent or friend/enemy or family member who is the author, star performer, director, and producer of everyone else's opinions, beliefs, judgements in their world. I 'hope' that you also open your eyes and SEE what is happening before you also lose what is most precious to you.
You can not win against a person who, gives you a gift and then tells others that you threatened them to abandon them, if they did not give it to you.
You can not win against a person who pretends to everyone else that all they want is your love and that if they don't shower you with gifts and do exactly what you say, you won't speak to them.
If they tell others that everytime they see you, you want something and that they don't know what to do because they just can't afford to give you any more, that there are things they would like to have and places they would love to go, but they can't because they have to do so much for you.
It is to late to deny that you never told that person that if they didn't give you their car, that you would never see them again. After they have signed the car over to you as a gift and you are absolutely shocked and surprised, not having any idea that they would do just a thing.
If a parent tells you they want to help you finish graduate school and you apply and are accepted, start your classes, get involved in a practicum and then out of the blue they jerk the finances back and you have to drop out. Then they tell everyone that they wanted to help you and you just quit. And to make it worse, you believe them a second time start grad school again, and they do the same thing. IDIOT, IDIOT, IDIOT.
This goes on and on. Finally, the family and mutual friends are looking at you as though you are a useless, selfish piece of trash and you have no idea why? Then to top it off and finish you off, this "LOVING VICTIM" OF YOURS, INDUCES you to move back into her influence from a home you love and a life you have finally found; only to strike the final blow and turn your own children against you. I am the BIGGEST OF ALL IDIOTS, I refused to give up on winning and believing in my mothers love.
She convinced me that she wanted to borrow money from the bank, sell her home, and give me the money to build a house and home on property I owned, so that my dream of being near and involved with my precious sons and grandchildren could be a reality. She borrowed the money, she put her house on the real estate market, she gave me the money she borrowed and I began the plans, architect, site, well, permits, and we were ready to build. The house I had lived in before I moved back to her, belonged to one of my sons so he sold it, since I was moving to a home with my mother. All the plans were under way, I was in seventh heaven, then GRUESS WHAT? Yes, wonder of wonders she decided that was not what she wanted. But worse yet, she told my sons that I was forcing her to sell her house and build a house for me. They don't speak to me anymore, or answer my calls, I have lost them. The kicker was that I was on disability and when she changed her mind I had already moved all of my belongings into a house I couldn't afford, she wanted an interim house while the new house was being built, when her house sold she didn't not want to live in an apartment, in the meantime. I lived on $700. a month at that time and I had no other money. I couldn't stay in the rented house and I could not afford to move. My OVERLY GENEROUS MOTHER, gave me the remainder of the loan money and told me to take it and go wherever I wanted to go. In the past two years she has called me numerous times and begged me to come and get her, saying she wanted to be with me and she missed me. When I would finally give in and say I am on my way, she would tell my sons that I was going to come and get her and take her away, she didn't want to go.
The last time was two days ago, I was ready to drive from Maine to California to get her, I looked at my finances and realized it would take every penny I have. I could ask what is wrong with me, but your blog shouted it out to me this morning. I AM AN ABSOLUTE, PERFECT IDIOT...and I can't win, I QUIT!!!!!!
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