Showing posts with label funny. Show all posts
Showing posts with label funny. Show all posts
Saturday, June 2, 2007
Friday, May 25, 2007
Wednesday, May 23, 2007
1. Hope in reality is the worst of all evils, because it prolongs the torments of man
If you have reached this point... it can still get worse ...
... because you can reach this point... but it can still get worse ...
... because you can reach this point.... and so on....
After all, life is like a movie, if you've sat through more than half of it and its sucked every second so far, it probably isn't gonna get great right at the end and make it all worthwhile. None should blame you for walking out early.
Friday, May 18, 2007
14. Sometimes the appropriate response to reality is to go insane
Take care... you could end up like this:
Wednesday, May 16, 2007
The journey of a thousand miles ... could end very very badly
Your work journey will probably end as below...
Monday, May 14, 2007
Going crazy
> > > I love my job, I love the pay.
> > > I love it more and more each day.
> > > I love my boss; he is the best.
> > > I love his boss and all the rest.
> > > I love my office and its location.
> > > I hate to have to go on vacation.
> > > I love my furniture, drab and gray,
> > > and the paper that piles up every day.
> > > I love my chair in my padded cell.
> > > There's nothing else I love so well.
> > > I love to work among my peers.
> > > I love their leers and jeers and sneers.
> > > I love my computer and its software;
> > > I hug it often though it don't care.
> > > I love each program and every file,
> > > I try to understand once in a while.
> > > I'm happy to be here, I am, I am;
> > > I'm the happiest slave of my ...............
> > > I love this work; I love these chores.
> > > I love the meetings with deadly bores.
> > > I love my job -- I'll say it again.
> > > I even love these friendly men,
> > > these men who've come to visit today
> > > In lovely white coats to take me away
> > > I love it more and more each day.
> > > I love my boss; he is the best.
> > > I love his boss and all the rest.
> > > I love my office and its location.
> > > I hate to have to go on vacation.
> > > I love my furniture, drab and gray,
> > > and the paper that piles up every day.
> > > I love my chair in my padded cell.
> > > There's nothing else I love so well.
> > > I love to work among my peers.
> > > I love their leers and jeers and sneers.
> > > I love my computer and its software;
> > > I hug it often though it don't care.
> > > I love each program and every file,
> > > I try to understand once in a while.
> > > I'm happy to be here, I am, I am;
> > > I'm the happiest slave of my ...............
> > > I love this work; I love these chores.
> > > I love the meetings with deadly bores.
> > > I love my job -- I'll say it again.
> > > I even love these friendly men,
> > > these men who've come to visit today
> > > In lovely white coats to take me away
Saturday, May 12, 2007
Poetic Resignation
Poetic Resignation
The name is good, the brand is big
But the work I do is that of a pig
The work or the brand; what is my way?
I don't know if I should stay.
To work, they have set their own way
Nobody will care to hear what I say
My will be NULL, they wont change their way
I don't know if I should stay.
The project is in a critical stage
But to do good work, this is the age
This dilemma is killing me day by day
I don't know if I should stay.
The money is good, the place is great
But the development is at a very small rate
Should I go for the work, or wait for pay
I don't know if I should stay!
The managers don't know what they talk
The team doesn't know where they walk
That's a bad situation, what say?
I don't know if I should stay.
I can go to any other place
But what if I get the same disgrace
I can't keep switching day by day
I don't know if I should stay.
The -ves are more, the +ves are less
Then why have this unnecessary mess
No more will I walk their way,
It's all done, I won't stay.
Thanks & Regards
Employee
The name is good, the brand is big
But the work I do is that of a pig
The work or the brand; what is my way?
I don't know if I should stay.
To work, they have set their own way
Nobody will care to hear what I say
My will be NULL, they wont change their way
I don't know if I should stay.
The project is in a critical stage
But to do good work, this is the age
This dilemma is killing me day by day
I don't know if I should stay.
The money is good, the place is great
But the development is at a very small rate
Should I go for the work, or wait for pay
I don't know if I should stay!
The managers don't know what they talk
The team doesn't know where they walk
That's a bad situation, what say?
I don't know if I should stay.
I can go to any other place
But what if I get the same disgrace
I can't keep switching day by day
I don't know if I should stay.
The -ves are more, the +ves are less
Then why have this unnecessary mess
No more will I walk their way,
It's all done, I won't stay.
Thanks & Regards
Employee
nice quotes & tips to follow not in life
There is NO hope
1. Quitters never win, Winners never quit, but those who never win and never quit trying are idiots
2. You tried and you failed … so the lesson learned is never try
3. Hope in reality is the worst of all evils, because it prolongs the torments of man
4. If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked something
5. Ambition is a poor excuse for not having sense enough to be lazy
6. It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others
7. Practice makes perfect, but nobody is perfect so, why practice
8. Today is not your day, tomorrow doesn’t look good either
9. If at first you don't succeed, give up, no use being a damn fool.
10. If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried
11. if you fail the first time, don't be a fool and try again
12. if you fail the first time, cheat and if you get caught lie
13. if you fail the first time, maybe failure is your thing
14. Sometimes the appropriate response to reality is to go insane
15. Of all the things that I have lost in life, I miss my mind the most
16. I don’t suffer insanity, I enjoy every minute of it
17. What good can come from a day that starts with getting up
18. We are born naked, wet and hungry. Then things get worse
19. Dreams - Dreams are like rainbows. Only idiot s chase them
20. Life is like a movie, if you've sat through more than half of it and its sucked every second so far, it probably isn't gonna get great right at the end and make it all worthwhile. None should blame you for walking out early
21. Most of the time I don't have much fun. The rest of the time I don't have any fun at all
22. Sometimes I wonder what am I fighting for…. I win some battles but I ALWAYS lose the war….
23. Remember things are never so bad that they can't get worse
24. The harder you try, the dumber you look
25. The first step to failure is trying
26. Some people are alive because it is illegal to kill them
27. If it is not my problem, it is not a problem
28. The world is divided into people who do things--and people who get the credit
29. Behind every good man is a bad man who will take credit for his work
30. Smoking is one of the leading causes of statistics
31. I believe that every human has a finite number of heart-beats. I don't intend to waste any of mine running around doing exercises
32. If the minimum wasn't acceptable it wouldn't be called the minimum.
33. I like work… it fascinates me… I could sit down and watch it for hours.
34. Hard work never killed anybody, but why take a chance?
35. One of the symptoms of an approaching nervous breakdown is the belief that one's work is terribly important
36. Hard work pays off in the future, laziness pays off now
37. I always arrive late at the office, but I make up for it by leaving early
38. If hard work were such a wonderful thing, surely the rich would have kept it all to themselves
39. I work for money, if you want loyalty get a dog
40. Some people are willing to work and some are willing to let them
41. I will never put off until tomorrow what can be put off forever
42. Self improvement is masterbation. Self destruction is the answer.
43. A conclusion is simply the place where you got tired of thinking
44. Good judgment comes from experience. Experience comes from bad judgment.
45. It's better to keep your mouth shut and give the impression that you're stupid than to open it and remove all doubt
1. Quitters never win, Winners never quit, but those who never win and never quit trying are idiots
2. You tried and you failed … so the lesson learned is never try
3. Hope in reality is the worst of all evils, because it prolongs the torments of man
4. If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked something
5. Ambition is a poor excuse for not having sense enough to be lazy
6. It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others
7. Practice makes perfect, but nobody is perfect so, why practice
8. Today is not your day, tomorrow doesn’t look good either
9. If at first you don't succeed, give up, no use being a damn fool.
10. If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried
11. if you fail the first time, don't be a fool and try again
12. if you fail the first time, cheat and if you get caught lie
13. if you fail the first time, maybe failure is your thing
14. Sometimes the appropriate response to reality is to go insane
15. Of all the things that I have lost in life, I miss my mind the most
16. I don’t suffer insanity, I enjoy every minute of it
17. What good can come from a day that starts with getting up
18. We are born naked, wet and hungry. Then things get worse
19. Dreams - Dreams are like rainbows. Only idiot s chase them
20. Life is like a movie, if you've sat through more than half of it and its sucked every second so far, it probably isn't gonna get great right at the end and make it all worthwhile. None should blame you for walking out early
21. Most of the time I don't have much fun. The rest of the time I don't have any fun at all
22. Sometimes I wonder what am I fighting for…. I win some battles but I ALWAYS lose the war….
23. Remember things are never so bad that they can't get worse
24. The harder you try, the dumber you look
25. The first step to failure is trying
26. Some people are alive because it is illegal to kill them
27. If it is not my problem, it is not a problem
28. The world is divided into people who do things--and people who get the credit
29. Behind every good man is a bad man who will take credit for his work
30. Smoking is one of the leading causes of statistics
31. I believe that every human has a finite number of heart-beats. I don't intend to waste any of mine running around doing exercises
32. If the minimum wasn't acceptable it wouldn't be called the minimum.
33. I like work… it fascinates me… I could sit down and watch it for hours.
34. Hard work never killed anybody, but why take a chance?
35. One of the symptoms of an approaching nervous breakdown is the belief that one's work is terribly important
36. Hard work pays off in the future, laziness pays off now
37. I always arrive late at the office, but I make up for it by leaving early
38. If hard work were such a wonderful thing, surely the rich would have kept it all to themselves
39. I work for money, if you want loyalty get a dog
40. Some people are willing to work and some are willing to let them
41. I will never put off until tomorrow what can be put off forever
42. Self improvement is masterbation. Self destruction is the answer.
43. A conclusion is simply the place where you got tired of thinking
44. Good judgment comes from experience. Experience comes from bad judgment.
45. It's better to keep your mouth shut and give the impression that you're stupid than to open it and remove all doubt
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)